If you take an Oriental person and spin
him around several times, does he become disoriented?
If people from Poland are called 'Poles,'
why aren't people from Holland called 'Holes'?
Why do we say something is out of whack?
What's a whack?
Do infants enjoy infancy as much as adults
enjoy adultery?
If a pig loses its voice, is it disgruntled?
Why do women wear evening gowns to nightclubs?
Shouldn't they be wearing night gowns?
If love is blind, why is lingerie so popular?
When someone asks you, 'A penny for your
thoughts,' and you put your two cents in, what happens to the other penny?
Why is the man who invests all your money
called a broker?
Why do croutons come in airtight packages?
It's just stale bread to begin with.
When cheese gets it's picture taken, what
does it say?
Why is a person who plays the piano called
a pianist but a person drives a race car not called a racist?
Why are a wise man and a wise guy opposites?
Why do overlook and oversee mean opposite
things?
If horrific means to make horrible, does
terrific mean to make terrible?
Why isn't 11 pronounced onety one?
'I am' is reportedly the shortest sentence
in the English language. Could it be that 'I do' is the longest sentence?
If lawyers are disbarred and clergymen
defrocked, doesn't it follow that electricians can be delighted, musicians
denoted, cowboys deranged, models deposed, tree surgeons debarked, and
dry cleaners depressed?
Do Roman paramedics refer to IV's as '4's?
Why is it that if someone tells you that
there are 1 billion stars in the universe you will believe them but if
they tell you a wall has wet paint you will have to touch it to be sure?
If Fed Ex and UPS were to merge, would
they call it Fed UP?
Do Lipton Tea employees take coffee breaks?
What hair color do they put on the drivers
licenses of bald men?
I was thinking about how people seem to
read the Bible a whole lot more as they get older, then it dawned on me...
they're cramming for their final exam.
I thought about how mothers feed their
babies with tiny little spoons and forks so I wondered, what do Chinese
mothers use? Toothpicks?
Why do they put pictures of criminals up
in the Post Office? What are we supposed to do, write to them? Why don't
they just put their pictures on the postage stamps so the mailmen could
look for them while they delivered the mail?
How much deeper would oceans be if sponges
didn't live there?
If it's true that we are here to help others,
then what exactly are the others here for?
You never really learn to swear until you
learn to drive.
No one ever says 'It's only a game,' when
their team is winning.
Ever wonder what the speed of lightning
would be if it didn't zigzag?
If a cow laughed, would milk come out her
nose?
If olive oil comes from olives, where does
baby oil come from?
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