Q) What have men and floor tiles got in common? 
A) If you lay them properly the first time, you can walk all over them for life. 

Q) How do men sort their laundry? 
A) "Filthy" and "Filthy but Wearable". 

Q) Why do men love computers? 
A) No matter what mood they're in, they can still get a floppy in. 

Q) What's the difference between a new husband and a new dog? 
A) After a year the dog is still excited to see you. 

Q) Why do men find it difficult to make eye contact? 
A) Breasts don't have eyes. 

Q) How many men does it take to screw in a light bulb? 
A) One. Men will screw anything. 

Q) What's a man's idea of foreplay? 
A) Half an hour of begging. 

Q) What are three stages of a man's life? 
A) Tri-Weekly, Try Weekly, Try Weakly.